Friday 12 March 2010

" Sexy" - am I being overly sensitive..?

I'm developing a serious problem with the word "sexy", and I think I'm going to have to vent my spleen here a bit - tell me what you think...

It seems totally acceptable now to use this word in mainstream situations: tv, magazines, etc. Now, I'm not talking about this from the point of view of an adult - I'm talking about it from the point of view of a mum to a 7 year old. Should I be getting upset when she puts on a new top, looks at herself in the mirror, strikes a silly pose and asks "d'ya think I'm seeexy?!". Now, she's doing it in a fun, jokey way - but, it makes me feel so uncomfortable. This word gets bantered around even on children's telly - and don't even get me started on pop videos/singers...

My daughter is clever, smart, funny, beautiful and a fabulous little character - she is NOT sexy.

So, when she asked if I thought she was "seeexy", I just smiled and said, "no sweetheart, you're not, you're my little girl and I love you." But she still wasn't sure if I was being mean or not. And what to say when she turns round (like she did the other day) and asks me what the word means? Well poppet, it means you're sexually attractive to other people...I think not!!!

I don't remember this word being in use when I was a kid. I might sound like a total old prude, but I'm not sure I'm getting upset for no reason am I? I don't even feel comfortable letting her watch pop videos - I'm so sick of seeing women with their bums on show grinding like a lap dancer. And then there's the Playboy range in Argos - Amy loves looking at those pages in the catalogue: they're all PINK! Oh, and it seems that once your child gets past the age 5/6 years clothing sizes, she's suddenly expected to dress like a psuedo teenager in black t-shirts with words like "Bitch" picked out in glitter. You're kidding me right...?

Tell me what you think...


  1. I completely agree - I don't like it when the word sexy is used about a child (I have actually heard parents call their young children 'sexy bum' or similar - er wrong!

    Also the playboy range, things for 6 year olds and toddler/child tshirts with inappropriate slogans on also get my rant gland going!

  2. I don't think you're being over sensitive at all!
    I think its revolting when you see little girls dressed up like women, with make up and high heels. I can't stand little girls clothing with things like 'cutie' across the bum - why would you attract anyones attention to your small childs bottom?

  3. Oh god, I hate - no sorry, HATE - those clothes. "Cheeky" and all that? God, its hideous...

    So glad I'm not alone ladies!

  4. same here, i think it's disgusting. kids are growing up too quickly without the parents encouraging it too.

  5. I agree - it means sexually attractive so shouldn't be used for a child. But so many people use it to just mean 'attractive' so no wonder kids pick up on it.

  6. I think it's shocking - Milly is 5 years old and I struggle to find clothing even now that I like on her!

    I remember once being at a local soft play centre and seeing a little girl- she couldn't have been older than 4 yrs with a pair of pink velour jogging bottoms with 'SEXY' across her bottom ..... WHAT the heck?!!

    When parents can't even be responsible enough to not allow thier children to wear provacative clothing at such a young age what do they expect they will turn out to be like when they are teenagers!? At this rate we will have a generation of lapdancers and young women with very low self respect and esteem.

    I happened to watch the new Lady Gaga & Beyonce Video today 'Telephone' - God forbid Milly sets eyes on that anytime before the age of at least 17 LOL!

    Kids grow up way too quickly anyway without it being encouraged by society!

  7. Tricky subject. We had an incident at school when my son was about 8 which led the school to reconsider allowing boys and girls getting changed for PE in the same classroom. One of my sons 8 year old classmates was wearing a pink sparkly thong under her school uniform! All parents were gobsmacked, and I didn't know you could buy thongs that small, but it caused a lot of trouble. Its unfortunate that not all parents think that dressing their young daughters so grown up is a problem!

  8. Oh, I hate shopping for clothes for Amy now! She's only just 7, but so tall she is now in age 9-10 clothes and they are often seriously hideous. Especially if you want to find an outfit for a party or something...Plus I reckon it will only be another year before she's in size 3 shoes - now that's when the heels debate will be firmly kicking in for our household!

    I'm gobsmacked about the thong story - that just takes my breath away. Mind you, even Tesco sells tiny, tiny padded bras. They would probably fit Amy. Maybe next time I'm in there I ought to try tackling the manager and not just turn away in my own private disgust. Perhaps we should all make a stand against this inappropriate clothing - the thongs and bras, the "sexy" jogging bottoms, the sparkly "bitch" t-shirts. Ooh, I'm coming over all strident now - maybe we should start a political campaign?!

    As mums it is our role to raise our children responsibly - to ensure they are happy, healthy, well balanced, confident - not to turn them into "mini me's". Our daughters are children, not oversized Barbie Dolls!!

    Thanks ladies for your support - I'm glad to hear I'm not a lone voice on this!

    Sarah x

  9. Why not check out the Mumsnet campaign on "Let girls be girls". We all need to take a stand against the major retailers and this is how you can:-

  10. yes Sarah i totally agree with that word,nice to know i'm not alone with that one,theirs other words too ,but don't get me started,as i start to feel like grumpy old women from the tv;lol


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